By Susan Nefzger – author of A Practical Guide to Living Fearlessly and A Practical Guide to Awareness –
When you let go of fear and face your surroundings, you call up the ability to alter the experience of the present moment. At this point, you can change the present landscape by changing your perception. It’s not escapism, it is the opposite, actually. The action taken assists in the realization that what you are sensing is only one way to interpret what is occurring.
The goal of mindfulness is to embrace the present, which helps by observing it, allowing for distance.
Then by observing without being immersed, you can interpret the current situation in a number of ways.
Think of a prism of light through the window reflecting off glass, you can see how the light refracts off the facets of glass or a crystal. While each perspective is part of the whole, they are all unique. Nothing is the absolute truth, though all are true.
Creation of Your Reality – Adopting a New Perspective
Since our mind has created patterns of thoughts and behaviors, we tend to filter our thoughts and actions based on what we already believe.
Becoming mindful of your own filters is a first step. Then learning how to change the filter, reminds us of our power to do so. Next, making a new choice is simplified, and creating new patterns helps you write a new story. The new story exists without the past filters and steers you to see the difference.
So, step back from the current reality and notice all the details, the sights, the smells, the filters, the patterns. What interpretations are you imposing on what is happening in your present moment?
Owning how you feel, and experience life is what will help you shift your feelings. The goal is to explore your internal landscape with a level of detachment instead of being psychologically or emotionally identified with it. The key is detachment. Detachment allows for observing, instead of being something.
Identification feels permanent like it will be that way forever. Observation sets you free from the illusion of emotional permanence.
Mindfulness Practice
Gaining distance and moving into the observer role can be trying at times. Especially if you are already feeling negative. Try these tips to gain a regular mindfulness moment in your day. Expand that moment into 15 minutes and then 30. As you realize what it takes, by retraining your brain, you can begin to live consciously without emotional pain or attachment.
- Find or create a guided meditation to use.
A guided meditation of any length or style can help you embrace where you are. As you listen to the meditation, you become relaxed and slide into the observer position.
Once you are in the observer position, you’ll realize the anxiety or fear, or emotion is not you. It is your state of mind brought about by circumstances. You can see clearly with the added perspective and distance provided by the guided meditation. What you observe is separate from you. Then you begin to see how you change your perspective of what you observe, which changes everything!
- Practice Observation
For example, just because your friend or sibling says they don’t like your outfit, it doesn’t have to elicit a response from you. Remember, no response is a response. So, by utilizing observation, you realize you are not the young person who would take it personally, because of an adolescent need for approval or acceptance. No, you are not your feelings of insecurity. Yes, you feel those things, but the feelings are not you, because you are separate from them.
When you separate from your emotions, you create space in which to make a different choice.
We can always remain present to understand the situation between observing and emotions.
This is the power of mindfulness! Once you get it, you then trust in your ability to remain present. The practice expands and you are living consciously on a daily basis. You are happier and your family, friends, and colleagues are too. - If it happens that you face negative and challenging emotions, slow down and be still.
This action will likely be the opposite of what you feel you need to do. But in the stillness, listen to your intuition as it speaks guiding and assisting you in the direction of the next right action for you to take. Breathe deeply through your nostrils, in and out a few times - feel the difference? Ahhhhhh…
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Author Bio: With the publication of a third practical guide, Susan Nefzger addresses the times we live in with “A Practical Guide to Living Fearlessly”. Inspired prior to and written during the pandemic, yet fueled by the vast changes our world has experienced since, the book is a straightforward, step-by-step guide to help us overcome blocks to living our best life in a joyful, passionate way. Susan utilizes spirituality and grounded instruction based on her coaching and personal experience, but always with a dash of humor. From enhancing your personal and work life, the way forward begins with awareness–through focusing on knowing yourself first. |
A veteran public relations professional with a highly substantive 30-year career, Susan sought answers on her quest for self-actualization. This led to a complete life transformation while attending a retreat in Glastonbury, England, in 2015, where inspiration flowed forth providing the impetus to write and publish “A Practical Guide to Awareness”, and the next year, “Putting Awareness into Practice”. She is the author of A Practical Guide to Living Fearlessly, A Practical Guide to Awareness, and its companion workbook — Putting Awareness into Practice.
Susan resides in Atlanta, GA where she shares her inspiration with others via online courses, workshops, and retreats. Stay tuned for the retreat schedule coming soon here: http://seeingbeyondtheordinary.com visit or @tips_for_fearless_living on Instagram.
